CHASING FLAMINGO

Writing this blog took me more than a month. I know what I wanna write but i dont know how. Ideas were flooding in my mind but it was too many that I always end up with confusion. I wasnt sure if I would end up with a sensible piece for this so I was keeping it in my saved drafts for the longest time. I cannot think of another creative way to present but the idea is about "wanting who I cannot hardly have and hating who are wanting me".

I've been asking this question eversince, why is that the things that you are craving for are so hard to get when those that are abundant within your reach seems not interesting at all. It is a human nature to hardly satisfy his fullfilment. We tend to ask for the simplest thing when along the way we would ask for something better, and end up with aiming for the most and this is becoming a natural cycle. In a brighter light, we call it human nature's longing for continous advancement.

I remember a movie released earlier this year, I guess the last movie I've seen (sorry, im not really a movie fanatic, but im an art patron). It was TRISTAN & ISOLDE - a very traditional, medieval and romeo & juliet type, yet artistically, well-done.

Not mentioning the cinematography and other technical aspect, the story is indeed a true-to-life reflection of our present lives. Tristan have to be rescued by a stranger (Isolde) whom he would attach himself to and vise versa. The union of their souls are challenged by the world around them that they have to sacrifiice their own happiness for the sake of many. If only one is able to fake his feelings and turn it for real, and go for something that wouldnt make himself happy and undoubtedly accept it as if it was his longing... and love someone he doesnt really like and take it as if it is the true love that his soul is wanting - then the world will have to loose at least half of its hurtings and pain.

TIRED OF JAMES BLUNT SONG

I first heard James Blunt with his single "Your'e Beautiful". Sophisticated, sexy and artistically done, the song got a different style. It went with Daniel Powter's hit single "Bad Day", another new taste and unique style. Since then, new singles came in the airwaives like "Cry", "Goodbye My Lover", "Tears and Rain", "Three Wisemen" and other hits (not just yet).

Blunt's music is a reflection of himself. True-to-life, experience-based creations that at least half of the world's population can relate with, and I'm not excluding myself. He once was a Buckingham Soldier, went into the wars and probably experienced life's bitter taste.. this is according to a trivia but I never had a chance to authenticate the fact.

Obviously I got this strong inclination towards his art. It deeply penetrates my soul whenever I would hear it playing, strangely weird because I didnt have the chance to see James Blunt's face as of this time. I started creating photo-slide videos with his song rendition with "Cry" to background my heart-freaking ;-) poem " Ode to my Heart" followed by his "Goodbye My Lover" to accompany my first-ever literary composed "My Crime" and recently, got tired of sounding too melancholic and oppressed with my poem "Reclusion" featuring "Tears and Rain".

All done for art's sake... regardless of the truth that it was entirely a correlation of my emotional state and way to express the unspoken, unheard, unexplained and misunderstood side of me. Tiring it may seems in the end but in the long run, his art is more than its aesthetic function but a therapy and ticket to a revival of a lost soul.

Here is the video rendition of "Reclusion"

KIDROCK IN ME

This is the song of my life, at this very moment so far, the time when I came to my weakest, helpless stage. I am no celebrity as Kidrock, but I am on my own way as every line of this song applies to me. Sing with me... feel the pain. You might never know... your own life's song may have the same melody.

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ONLY GOD KNOWS WHY

I've been sittin here, tryin to find myself
I get behind myself, I need to rewind myself
Lookin for the payback, listen for the playback
They say that every man bleeds just like me

And I feel like number one, yet I'm last in line
I watch my youngest son, and it helps to pass the time
I take too many pills it helps to ease the pain
I made a couple of dollar bills, but still I feel the same

Everybody knows my name, they say it way out loud
A lot of folks fuck with me, it's hard to hang out in crowds

I guess that's the price you pay, to be some big shot like I am
Out strecthed hands and one night stands, still I can't find love

And when your walls come tumbling down, I will always be around

Yeah
As it...hey - And when your walls come tumbling down, I will always be around

People don't know about the things I say and do
They don't understand about the shit that I've been through
It's been so long since I've been home, I've been gone, I've been gone for way too long
Maybe I forgot all things I miss, oh somehow I know there's more to life than this

I said it too many times, and I still stand firm
You get what you put in, and people get what they deserve
Still I ain't seen mine, no I ain't seen mine
I've been giving just ain't been gettin, I've been walking that there line
So I think I'll keep a walking, With my head held high
I'll keep moving on and only God knows why

Only God... Only God
Only God knows why, why, why, why
Only God...knows...why, why, why
Only God knows why
Take me to the river edge
Take me to the river, hey hey hey

CALL CENTER BLOOPERS (copied from another blog)

favorite line#1: "thank you for calling so much" (so much jud, daghan na kaayong thank you na bai.)

favorite line #2: "thank you so much for calling to you"bwahahhaah!)

favorite line #3: "i'm breaking up on you,too" ( uuuuy! boyfriend-girlfriend mo?)

favorite line #4: well first, can i have your first and last name first?...ok for that one...you first have to save an itinerary first... ( this guy's favorite word must be "first')

favorite line #5: "the passenger has to die first before you will get a refund" (hihihi ayus!)

favorite line #6: "for this one you have to sign up first before you have to be signed up,ok?"(obviously kana ang meaning intawon!)

favorite line #7: "i can see that this is an unreserved reservation"

favorite line #8: "the sign up process is very free " you mean there are sign-up processes that are slightly free or half-free?"

favorite line #9: "how age is your son?"(hahahahaha! hala sigi paningkamut ug maayo!)

favorite line #10: "do you have a pen and a ballpen?" (how about a pencil? do i need to have it,too? )

favorite line #11: "please bring a government photo issued id" (laluma sa english uy!)

favorite line #12: "could you repeat that again,please?"

favorite line #13:" because actually you need to actually sign up for an account first"( murag artista ba..actually..)

favorite line #14: "that is eastern pacific time" (buot buot kag time zone doh!)

favorite line #15: "can i have your sine in and location pless..." (asa na ang american accent training?)

favorite line #16: "to activate your card, please tell me your expiration date!" (sus! taningan ba ang kustumer)

favorite line #17: (for an opening line..) "thank you so much for that information... "(yeah right! the caller hasn't even said anything yet!)

favorite line #18: ( a call during Christmas day,an agent had this for a closing remark! ) "Thank you for calling and happy halloween!" (YIKES! i don't think Santa is gonna give you presents for this:( )

favorite line #19: "have a...have a...have a... have a happy holiday!"

favorite line #20: "have a...have a...have a...have a happy day!" (trying to find for a better adjective for a day,huh?)

favorite line #22: "would you like to reserve this for january nine or january tane?" (uhuh! american accent training!)

favorite line #23: "well,it defends..." (i repeat! american accent training!)

favorite line #24: (new dead air verbiage!)" if i don't hear from you within 5 minutes, i'm afraid i will have to release this call..."(you're willing to wait that long?)

favorite line #25: "i'm sorry i can't seem to access your account. are you sure you're already a passenger of expedia.com?" (the passenger is calling to purchase a flight meaning he is not yet a
passenger!!!! for heaven's sake!)

favorite line #26:" i'm sorry but my supervisor is having a conversation right now..."( conversation jud? )

favorite line #27: "ok you will be leaving 9am in the morning" ( wait lang! karon pa ko! is there a 9pm in the morning? )

favorite line #28: "would you want to add 1 children for this itinerary?" ( 1 children?! )

favorite line #29:" thank you for calling, Mr. coupon" (pwede diay ta makabunyag og passenger?)

favorite line #30: "how many passengers will be staying in the room?" ( uy! flying hotel room? )

favorite line #31: "i'll just tell him nalang!" ( karon pa ko! international language na diay ang tagalog!)

favorite line #32: "ok for that one let me verify with my computer...according to my computer..." ( i would love to get that computer...what brand?)

favorite line #33: "if i don't see you within 5 seconds, i'm afraid...".( my goodness! we are in the philippines . how on earth can the caller be here for you to see him in 5 seconds?!)

favorite line #34: (passenger shouting on the other line) "sige..sige...sige..."

favorite line #35: "would you like to add and attractions and services for this one? "( asa dapita sa purchase path ang "and attractions and services'? wa lagi ko kita ani?)

favorite line #36: "what i can offer you is a one times courtesy void "( naay two times? )

favorite line #37: "let me just walk you to the set-up "(mura man walk you to the door...kimpang ang caller? asa na dapita ang set-up?)

favorite line #38: "i'm sorry but there is something wrong with the airplane..."( passenger: what? my flight will still be in two months!)

favorite line #39:" i need to verify this one so let me just hold you for a while,ok?" (uy! very sweet na agent!)

favorite line #40: "i'm sorry but because of the queue that we are having, i'm afraid my supervisor is taking a call right now.. "(passenger asks how many calls are waiting?) "we are actually having 59 calls on queue..." (sus! giduka na gali ang uban kay walay calls!)

WEANING, CRYING & A LESSON LEARNED

Two hours after their plane departed, I finished reading “Ten Days to Zero” by Bernard Ashley. It took me three days to complete the reading as electricity went down for two days after the typhoon hit Manila. Telephone lines were cut and no water supply came as the worst. I simply wanted to keep myself busy, as always, and that time when I even got no cellular phone to use for texting. I wanted to have a busy mind. Few days before, Mom and Dad were too busy preparing some stuff as they’re bound to United Kingdom for the next few months, longer enough, considering that we never got parted ever since. I knew days would be different as to no one’s going to wake me up each time, cook for my food, wash my clothes, and simply do things for me. I couldn’t careless; after all, I still have my own issues… things that they are aware of.

Two hours after I’m done reading, I cried. Suddenly I felt our house was entirely empty. Most of the time, I usually spend time myself alone in my room and wanting to talk to no one, I and my parents are used to it. Few hours ago, we were rushing at the airport, went home and everything were normal. I didn’t feel anything sad or emotional. That time was different. It was unusual. I felt alone. I tried to hold back my tears.

Two hours after, I realized one of the most important lessons learned ever. The love that I was searching for was just next to me. I was wrong when I thought my life went in waste for amongst the people I cared, loved and valued for, nobody did in return. I didn’t get to show my care to the people who truly heeded and carried me when I was in a difficult situation. My parents who were always with me is the greatest love of my life and I was wrong to think that they are rather a responsible of my existence than affection beyond duty. (UNFINISHED/UNEDITED)