R.S.V.P.

i wish im home, back to where i belong

where i spent the whole of my 26 years of living

with the people who cares much for me, people who i never paid enough attention

i wish i am well, on this especial day

so i would feel dearly exceptional

at least once in a year with full of challenges and dismay

i wish im not alone so i dont have to do stupid things

cos i might regret, when things get sorted with me.

i wish my wishes were granted so i could appreciate the gift of another year existence.

THE DRAGONFLY

Love makes us what kind of person we are. Its shaping our values based on what we have been into. Sometimes we are mean, dumb and uncaring because we saw and learned it somewhere from the past. It could be our parents, friends and previous relationship partners. We are what we eat and we are what we grew up with. Human beings, when in love, are selfish creatures. What they all care about is their feelings. They are bound to hurting other people intentionally or not and their existence lies on a touch-and-go game.

When I was a kid, I remember I caught an insect using a long palm leaf stick with a resin from a tree to stick them on it. My mom saw me with a dark red-coloured dragonfly caught between my fingers. I was a very curious child and out of my mean curiosity i tore both wings so it couldnt fly away and i could play with it. It's been really nice watching it struggle wanting to fly away. I held it againts me and had a close watch at its face that looks like an alien in a helmet. Suddenly, my curiousity led into something more that I had to tear its head and watch it strangle to death. My mom said to me "Did you ever realise how did it take to have that dragonfly be like what it is?" I didnt understand her at that point but she instilled to me that no matter how small and ugly a living thing is, nature took a great care to have it as it is and killing such a wonderul creature is very mean. I remembered once she told me about rice plants, how its being planted and grown, and the process of the nature nurturing every grain to make it to our tables to eat, it took months to grow, uncounted drops of sweat to produce and immeasurable effort from the nature to make it and its completely worthless to spare a single grain of it. This made a lot of sense to me and i would never forget this lesson ever.

We are all like a kid that i was and dragonflies at the same time. As we live on, we play with curiousity. We tend to get attracted to dragonflies with the most distinctive colours and sophisticated features, and as long as we got them in our hands we make them stuck to us and push to their limits. We would never realise what that fly have been through before reaching us until we become another dragonfly ourselves and experience the same fate. Its just a very awful situation that real dragonflies die right within the hands of a curious child and human dragonflies die and get back into life and flies again and fall on another playful kid and suffer death all over again.

RETURN TO SENDER (with no forwarding address)

Why is that when i love someone, it doesnt seem to fit
and when somebody else loves me, i barely care?
Why cant I settle for less when its gonna give me their best?
Am I not destined to find happiness? Dont I deserve joy?
Life gives me no other options but to choose between what is wrong that makes me happy,
and the righteous that makes no sense to me. My heart and mind are greatest enemy.
Is this the way it should be?
I learned to set free. I learned to supress myself.
I even learned to love in silence and hide the pains with brilliant smiles
Am i doing it right?
Why do i keep believing in love? My faith is strong but is it enough to keep me going?
Why cant I be like the person that the world wants me to be?
Why do I strive for the best when I hated myself?

--------------------------------

WITH EVERY STEP

JONATAN CERRADA performs live at the 2004 EUROVISION

A CHAQUE PAS

Jonatan Cerrada

Il y a des blessures

Qu’on devra oublier

Tellement de ratures

Qu’il faudra effacer

Souffler très fort pour que s’envole de nos cœurs la rancune

Et puis faire tomber les barrières une à une…

A chaque pas que l’on fera

A chaque geste qu’on offrira

Ce sera le début d’un autre demain

Dans chaque mot que l’on dira

Dans ce futur qu’on construira

C’est l’Amour que dessineront nos mains

Il y a des injures

Qu’il faudra pardonner

Des cris contre des murs

Qui lesferont tomber

Déposons les armes à nos pieds, délaissons nos armures

Et que nos conflits ne soient plus que murmure

A chaque pas que l’on fera

A chaque geste qu’on offrira

Ce sera le début d’un autre demain

Dans chaque mot que l’on dira

Dans ce futur qu’on construira

C’est l’Amour que dessineront nos mains

La bataille sera longue

Mais tu sais elle en vaut la peine

L’enfant en nous trouvera le cheminIl y a des felures

Qui resteront brisées

Des coups un peu durs

A jamais marqués

A chaque pas que l’on fera

A chaque geste qu’on offrira

Se que al final lograras encontrar

La paz y la felicitad

En tu camino hallaras

Todo lo que deseas alcanzar

C’est l’Amour que dessineront nos mains.

JONATAN CERRADA music video of A Chaque Pas

This song is truly wonderful. He didnt make it to the Eurovision but its legendary. He was one of the best on the history.

THE PERSON IN ME

I am the inventor, the risk taker, and the developer of new ideas and schemes that can either plummet myself into bankruptcy or catapult to riches and glory. Dozens of ideas ricochet in my head at any given moment, and I can talk circles around anyone I know. I am the epitome of creativity.

Falling in love may take a while for me because of my selective nature: I am the type of person who may pass by several “quality candidates” until I feel I have found the ideal mate. As a result, I may be single for far longer than my friends and family expected me to be. Even when I find the right person, I still want to maintain my sense of uniqueness and personal space. As a result, I need a partner who will leave me alone when I desire it - a partner who has her own sense of self-confidence and autonomy and doesn’t need to be around me twenty-four/seven.

Tips for myself

Where can I meet an Innovator? Innovators are the most eclectic of the Knowledge Seekers; their spontaneous and inquisitive nature takes them almost everywhere. They are especially delighted by social events that trigger their imaginative and logical minds. Look for Innovators anywhere their powerful intellect can be stimulated and where they can exercise their considerable communication skills.

Hell, this is not an advertisement of myself but this could be helpful to someone. This is another crazy result of a personality test that I recently completed. And just like horoscopes and predictions, I do not rely and completely believe on what this has to say but at least a reference and a kindda "nice to know" stuff. I hope you had fun and learned something new about me today. Cheers.